Friday, May 4, 2018

The Beauty that Sustains Us

It's Friday. I will go for a walk and buy a small bunch of daffodils to bring spring into my apartment.

My mother always said buying cut flowers was a "waste" because they would "only die." She did "plant" plastic poinsettias in the window boxes at Christmas. When I went away to college, if I had a couple of dollars left at the end of the week (I worked a couple of jobs) I would buy a small bunch of cut flowers at the grocery store- it felt like such a gift to myself.

Then my parents came to visit, and my mother saw a small potted rubber tree I'd bought for $1.99 for my room (I'd made sure there were no cut flowers), and announced, "That's it- you are cut off! You're not wasting our money on this kind of frivolous spending." She paused and then screamed at me, "Who do you think you are?!!"

It was okay- if it hadn't been that, it would have been something else and their financial support had been minimal, and I had my jobs. And, more importantly, to this day I love buying cut flowers - sometimes just one- as a gift to myself of the beauty that sustains me. Sometimes, as I put them into a vase I answer the question my mother asked so long ago, and whisper to myself with a smile, "This is who I am."

I wonder what beauty my mother longed for but would not allow herself.~Oriah


6 comments:

  1. How lovely! When I was a student, I was living in a north-facing room with no direct sunlight. The owner of the building had decorated it in white and black, and no alterations were allowed. So I bought myself bright red and yellow tulips with the little money I had, and gazed at their colours to fill my being with their beauty. As soon as I had my own place, I painted the walls sunlight yellow. To this day, I gaze at flowers, rocks and minerals, and landscapes to fill my heart with beauty, to nourish my being and connect to my soul ♥

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    1. Lovely- we all need some colour in our lives. :) Oriah

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  2. How sad that your mother was not able to see the beauty in cut flowers or plants. I could not live my life without them. May blossoms and foliage continue to grace your home ��

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    1. Thank you Diva. The odd thing is that my mother always had a home filled with potted plants (which is why I thought the little rubber tree would pass muster.) But, as I said, if it had not been this it would no doubt have been something else. Just glad I discovered the joy of cut flowers. :) Oriah

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  3. Beautiful Oriah, You deserve all the flowers and more, every day! May you never loose the joy which those flowers bring you. I could live in a flower shop :-) I never tire of looking at flowers, I keep caressing their beautiful petals and thank them for being so gorgeous :-) xox Sabine

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    1. Thanks Sabine- flowers life our spirits and warm our hearts. :) oriah

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